Sunday, November 23, 2014
Feels and ish
I think it is difficult to sit down and really state explicitly what my values are, there are definitely somethings that can be said but to me these feelings are mostly innate. I value time, time with my friends/families, time with myself, time is so precious and we so rarely think of it. I ask for honesty at all times about all things because I will do my best to always be honest about my thoughts and feelings. I look for selflessness because I think that the world is already to selfish. I look for trust in all aspects because there is a lack of trustworthy people to me. I value a sense of what is right and what is wrong and where to draw the line. I look for these, and many more traits, in my friends because, to me, these make the best and most meaningful relationships. And I live these, to the best of my ability, everyday, even to a fault. I am always honest about how I am feeling, and many times it has forced people out because I am too emotional. I have made many enemies and conflicts because I stand firmly to what I believe is right or wrong. I have heard many heart-breaking secrets because my friends find me trustworthy. I hate saying these things because, well, frankly that's just how I operate. And the biggest struggle I find is not being true to my value but being true to myself. I struggle to trust in my relationships, especially the people I call my best friends. It has a lot to do with past experience but also because I try to give 150% and that can be a lot to people. And sometimes it hurts when it isn't returned, and it makes me feel like people don't care about me. But everyone is different and I have to trust in myself first to trust in these people.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Ryan,
ReplyDeleteI appreciate where you took this, rather than simply state your values. You explained how hard it really is not identify them but there are things that we do value in ourselves and others that we can. I like you, have trouble being able to always be true to myself and I your take on this was so refreshing. I’ve always believed that a true leader states when they have problems and that you were able to admit your struggles makes you a true leader in my book.
For a fairly short blog post, Ryan, you definitely hit the nail on the head with how you were able to describe yourself and how much emotion you put into it. If I didn't already know you from class, I would say you are an individual who is genuine above all others. Yea, we sometimes suppress our true feelings, but that is, in my mind, a characteristic based out of respect for others than one of weakness of the individual.
ReplyDelete